The Eggspectations of a Household.

 The family favourite and the most purchased grocery item in my kitchen would be eggs. 

Now, if you're thinking, "Well, that's a simple breakfast option yet a nutritious one." I humbly invite you into my kitchen for a reality check.

For an Indian Malabari household, eggs are supposed to be the run-of-the-mill breakfast option. The dining table is expected to be served with hot freshly cooked pathiris that directly land on the plates from the hot griddle and a flavourful non veg curry to go with it, specially the deep red ones simmering away on the stove.

The option of ‘just eggs’ would be viewed as very uninspiring. 

It carries a silent accusation, that whoever is in charge of the stove has lacked conviction, choosing the easy way out.

But the truth of the matter is, this egg day is hardly the time saving option it's made out to be. Each member of the family wants their eggs to have a uniqueness to it. The method of cooking, the duration of cooking, the colour, the texture, half done, fully done, almost done but not quite done—there is a surprisingly long list of specifications to be honoured.

One needs a sunny side up with no breaking of the yolk, perfectly centered. Flip it without breaking it and cook it for 10 seconds to solidify the whitish greasy part. Now flip it again while serving without disrupting its centre of gravity!.

At this point, kneading pathiri dough starts to sound like a less demanding task.

Next comes the scrambled eggs. Each scrambled piece has to have a specific size-not bigger than a grape and not smaller than a pea . It's possible, just like mastering perfect sushi. You need to fully immerse yourself in achieving this remarkable precision. The eggs must exist in a delicate state somewhere between too soft and too firm. Nobody can define this state scientifically, yet everyone in the family knows exactly when it has been missed.

After two milestones are crossed, the next is the omelette. Even when my patience is fraying at the edges, I try to remember exactly what veggies goes in, what peppers and chillies to add, when to add mushrooms and when not to add cheese. 

As the morning looks very productive, I consider myself as a fully ordained chef of the family, managing a highly specialised egg establishment.

Whenever I am in my Nigella Lawson mood, I prepare Turkish poached eggs or shakshuka for some variety, feeling quite content with my culinary skills.

From my vantage point behind the stove, eggs are not the shortcut meal they are reputed to be. They are a collection of customised orders masquerading as simplicity.

Now tell me, what does breakfast look like in your household? And how many different ways can you make an egg?